So this is weird. This morning, I went to my email like I do every Friday morning to start the Pet of the Week and realize: I have no more submissions. Yes, I know I should have known this earlier but I’ve procrastinated my entire life, why stop now? Many of you have promised to send in submissions, which is the purpose of this as I am now holding you all accountable for sending me in your pet.
It is Friday and the show must go on. While it sucks, that means you’re subjected to one of my pets. I figured no one would mind and as Tom Petty once said, “I know you’ll forgive me because hey, I can do whatever I want.” I have two dogs, three cats and a dang bird. This little bundle of fluffy joy comes to you from yours truly. Please give a round of applause for Zelda. She’s a fuzzy black kitty about a year old. I have no idea if she’s part Maine Coon or torty or something as she has interesting colors.
First and foremost, her name wasn’t always Zelda. Originally, her name was Peanut because as you can see, she was tiny. So tiny in fact that her foster mom didn’t think she’d make it. She has respiratory problems so she sounds like the Notorious B.I.G. when she is winded. Zelda came from a cat colony that some lovely volunteers helped trap and neuter. This story has a happy ending. Zelda has since recovered and has been dubbed “Fat Spooky” as her nickname as she haunts the house. Sorry for the NSFL if you have a weak stomach, I wanted to highlight how far she’s come.
Zelda is a huntress. She has killed countless bugs and varmint, and catches the toy rope in her mouth on the first try nearly every time. While she may have great paw eye coordination, she’s not exactly graceful and often falls out of the window sill. She loves to hang out with you when you take a shit, enjoys being pet, being carried but above all and she loves to eat (that’s where Fat Spooky comes in). She eats every meal like it’s her last and we have to feed her separately as she will demolish the other cats food.
Zelda is smart as a whip. She even has figured out how to open stuff, including lids and doors. She enjoys hiking on the leash and carrying toys around the house. She enjoys snuggling and playing with her sister. I often carry Zelda over to her sister Maizey, who is a brutish (in size) lab/pit/boxer mix that lays on top of her. I call this “feeding the cat to the dog”. Inventive, I know. Zelda then gets laid on and licked. It help keep her in check when she’s rummaging around and being bad.
Overall, Zelda is a cool ass cat. She’s playful and has learned a lot from her brothers and sisters in the house. They all live harmoniously and even though Zelda bullies the bird, they still get along and she never hurts him. I enjoy living in a zoo, there’s never a dull moment.
I have some openings now so if you’ve been holding off, please send me your pet you’d like to highlight, whether it’s a dog, cat, bird, lizard, snake or what have you, please send me an email at email@example.com titled, “Pet of the Week” along with some information about your pet, Twitter handle, a few pictures for the article and Twitter. I cannot promise when it will be published, but I will do my very best to bring a new face and story every Friday at noon for your viewing pleasure.