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The Week In Ridiculous Holidays: June 3rd – June 9th

It’s the first full week of June, and it would seem that we really want to kick off the month by eating. Eggs, chocolate macaroons, cheese, donuts, and chocolate ice cream are all celebrated this week. So much for that summer body.

Monday, June 3, 2019

National Egg Day

The only kind of eggs I like are those Cadbury Mini Eggs they sell at Easter. Otherwise, gross.

National Chocolate Macaroons Day

I didn’t like macaroons until I had them in Paris? Have I ever mentioned that I’ve been to Paris?

National Repeat Day

As in repeat eating chocolate macaroons? No problem.

Tuesday, June 4, 2019

National Old Maids Day

You know, it’s pretty fitting that Old Maids Day is also the same day as…

National Cheese Day

Because I will celebrate both by eating my weight in cheese.

National Cognac Day

Does cognac go well with cheese?

National SAFE Day

One in every three households in the United States has a gun stored somewhere inside.  National SAFE Day asks all gun owners to make sure those guns are stored safely, where a child cannot access them. I’m looking at you, Delph.

Wednesday, June 5, 2019

National Gingerbread Day

I’d like to motion that gingerbread move from being a seasonal thing to an-all-year-round treat. Second?

National Moonshine Day

Geesh, it’s the week of Delph up in here.

National Veggie Burger Day

I don’t like hamburgers and I don’t like veggie burgers, so I’m sort of fucked when it comes to burgers.

National Running Day 

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve tried to take up running. I’ve finally accepted I do not like it and that’s ok.

Thursday, June 6, 2019

D-Day

“The day (June 6, 1944) in World War II on which Allied forces invaded northern France by means of beach landings in Normandy.” In case you slept through high school history.

National Eyewear Day 

Do guys make passes at girls in glasses yet? I’d like to stop wearing my contacts.

National Higher Education Day

Also known as National Debt You’ll Never Pay Off Day!

National Gardening Exercise Day

Finally, I can count my gardening as exercise.

National Yo-Yo Day

Never been able to master the yo-yo, sadly.

National Drive In Movie Day

I’ve never been to a drive in. Sad face.

National Applesauce Cake Day

I’ve also never had applesauce cake. Double sad face.

National Oklahoma Day

Taylor lives in Oklahoma! Hi Taylor!

Friday, June 7, 2019

National Boone Day

As in Daniel Boone.

National Chocolate Ice Cream Day

Oh, yeahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

National VCR Day

Does anyone still own a VCR?

National Doughnut Day 

Hit up your local Dunkin’ for a free one. Or if you live in MA, you can just drive within a one mile radius and hit up at least 12.

Saturday, June 8, 2019

National Best Friends Day

You know, I don’t have one “best friend” – I’ve got a lady gang and I can’t pick whose best among them.

National Name Your Poison Day

Vodka. Always vodka.

National Upsy Daisy Day

You know, I don’t think I’ve heard anyone say upsy daisy in forever. How quaint.

National Rosé Day 

Rosé all day. I hate myself.

Sunday, June 9, 2019

National Donald Duck Day

You gotta salute a man so comfortable in himself he never wears pants.

National Strawberry Rhubarb Pie Day

My gran used to make this and I tried so hard to like it. Nope.

National Children’s Day 

I don’t have any, but I’m pretty sure if you are parent, every day is children’s day, isn’t it?

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