I’m on vacation this week, so every day is a holiday. And I’ll be able to celebrate with tacos, vodka and homemade cookies, so what’s better than that? Not much, I dare say.
Monday, September 30
National Chewing Gum Day
Chewing gum? Yes. The sound of someone chewing gum? NO.
National Mud Pack Day
Is this the same as a face mask?
National Hot Mulled Cider Day
Yes. I love it, even if it’s essentially warm apple juice.
National Love People Day
Tuesday, October 1
National Black Dog Day
I love all colors of dog.
Fire Pup Day
I SAID ALL THE DOGS!
National Hair Day
Maybe this will be the one day mine will do what I want.
National Homemade Cookies Day
Homemade cookies are soooooooo much better than store bought ones.
National Eat Fruit At Work Day
Why would I eat fruit if there are homemade cookies?
Wednesday, October 2
National Produce Misting Day
There’s a holiday for those little things that water the produce at the grocery store?
National Custodial Worker’s Recognition Day
Who the hell do you think cleans your stanky office bathroom? These heroes, that’s who.
National Name Your Car Day
Hit me in the comments with your car names. I need to steal a good one.
National Fried Scallops Day
I think you all know I’m allergic to shellfish by now, right?
National Walk to School Day
Both ways, uphill, in the snow.
National Pumpkin Seed Day
I buy a pumpkin every October just to roast the seeds. And before you say it, yes I know I can buy them, but that’s not as much fun.
National Coffee with a Cop Day
Or better yet, buy a cop a coffee. They deserve it.
Thursday, October 3
National Techies Day
Like the IT guys? I love those guys.
National Boyfriend Day
Friday, October 4
National Taco Day
National Vodka Day
These are a few of my favorite things…
National Golf Lover’s Day
Love is a strong word. Moderately like is more what I’m feeling.
National Manufacturing Day
How else do you think you get….everything?
National Body Language Day
Mine pretty much constantly says “Don’t talk to me” and I’m ok with that.
Saturday, October 5
National Get Funky Day
It’s time to get funky!
National Rhode Island Day
“The world’s largest bug is on the roof of New England Pest Control in Providence. It’s a big blue termite, 58 feet long and 928 times actual termite size.” Tis true – I drive by it on my way to CT because there’s nothing to actually do in RI.
National Do Something Nice Day
I did something nice yesterday and now I have a broken toe, so take that for what you will.
National Apple Betty Day
Sunday, October 6
National Coaches Day
All hail Bill Belichick, the greatest of all time.
National Orange Wine Day
Is there actually such a thing as orange wine?
National Plus Size Appreciation Day
Turns out I’m 100% that bitch.
National Mad Hatter Day
Hands down, the most annoying character in Wonderland.
National German-American Day
National Noodle Day
Carbs, carbs and more carbs.